LYSOL

 
Flu season has started and it’s technically still summer. This means that I will now start going through a bottle of Lysol both at my house and work every week. When I lived alone, I only had to spray down my house once daily, when I first arrived home from work. However, now that I have a roommate this means multiple spray sessions throughout the day. And I spray! I don’t half-ass it when it comes to sterilizing my house. I wear the mask and glasses when I decontaminate. I’m so obsessed about not getting sick that I most likely am causing greater harm to myself in the long run with coating my house with a layer of Lysol every two hours. Still, I’d rather save all the sickness for the end of my life, when I can retire to third world country, eating pot brownies all day, staring out at the sea from my rented condo and stuffing my face with fresh fish and rice made by an exotic local instead of slowly dying in some poor fluorescent lit nursing home being force fed cold pureed meatloaf by a miserable, sexless nurse aid.

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